Friday, December 14, 2007

BREAKING NEWS-- DEM LEADERS CHOSEN BY U.S. OLYMPIC COMMITTEE

Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi were beaming tonight after learning that the United States Olympic Committee has chosen every member of the Democratic congressional leadership to represent the U.S. in the next Olympics, to be held next year in China.

"Of course we're going", said Reid while holding hands with Pelosi at a joint press conference. "This is exactly what we have worked so hard for all year. Spelunking (caving) is being introduced next year as a demonstration sport, and we decided early on that we wanted to represent our country on the world stage."

"We have shown what we can do in every area. We've caved on impeachment, we've caved on war funding and withdrawal dates, we've caved on the energy bill by taking out provisions to take back tax breaks for big oil, we caved on Mukasey, hell, we even caved on S-CHIP. We've caved so consistently and successfully that the Olympic search committee had no choice but to pick our team."

"We have heard the complaints from a few of our constituents who simply did not understand the 'big picture'. But it was worth it, because our efforts have paid off, and we are confident that we will make every citizen of our great nation proud."

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